HEAPS GAY. MANY NEWS. MUCH SUMMARY.

By Samuel Leighton-Dore

Bigoted Alabama judge bans same-sex marriage 

The Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court, Roy S. Moore, has today proven that despite being the highest power in the state’s highest court – he’s an absolute moron. Which, given my recent Making A Murderer-fuelled interest in the US justice system, doesn’t exactly come as a surprise. 

Believeing Alabama to be exempt from last year’s glorious nationwide legalisation of same-sex marriage, Moore this week barred Alabama probate judges from issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples – rationalising that Alabama had not been explicitly mentioned in the United States Supreme Court Obergefell v. Hodges ruling. He wrote:

“Until further decision by the Alabama Supreme Court, the existing orders of the Alabama Supreme Court that Alabama probate judges have a ministerial duty not to issue any marriage license contrary to the Alabama Sanctity of Marriage Amendment of the Alabama Marriage Protection Act remain in full force and effect.”

How many times can a man write the word “Alabama” in a one-paragraph statement? Five.

Sigh.

 

Bully victims shame prestigious school, excel in life.

Two former students of Auckland Grammar School have today called for the prestigious boys school to develop more effective ways of supporting gay and transgender students, claiming the school fostered a culture of bullying and descrimination, reports the New Zealand Herald. 

“Every day, I would dread going to class for being targeted and made fun of. Getting out of bed is already difficult enough for most people,” said Henry Yuen, the former school dux. 

“For me it was almost impossible because, at Grammar, I could not be myself. I was afraid, traumatised and had nobody to confide in.”

He and former school captain Joel Bateman have claimed they were forced to conform to a “heteronormative Grammar way” throughout their studies.

Despite their repressive schoolyard experiences, this tale has a happy ending. Mr. Bateman is now at Harvard University studying human development and regenerative biology, while Mr. Yuen studies engineering and computer science at Duke University.

Not too shabby, boys.

Regardless of preferred sexual position, we at Heaps Gay reckon you’re both absolute tops. 
Star Wars: the only gays in the galaxy?

In breaking Star Wars: The Force Awakens news, a bunch of Tumblr fans are passionately theorising that characters Poe and Finn are gay. The evidence? In a recent cast appearance on Ellen, actor John Boyega, who plays Finn, stated: “I think it’s a very subtle romance that’s happening. You have to just look very closely – you have to watch it a few times to see the little hints but, there was. At least, I was playing romance.”

Despite not specifying with whom his affection lay, it was enough to send fan-fictioning internet geeks into a horny fucking tailspin. Having not seen the film, I can’t really comment. But (spoiler alert) I hear there was some suggestive tone and lip biting involved in Poe and Finn’s reunion at the Republic base.

I guess we’ll have to tune into the next instalment to find out. Giddy up!